Change of Luck

One of my mother's saying goes, "If he didn't have bad luck, he'd have no luck at all." It is usually directed at my brother. Well, I feel like this year has started off under a very unlucky cloud around here. First there was my fall, and just when I'm ready to get back to work this week we get a snow storm. We only have around 3-4 inches but it has me scared to venture out since that is what got me into trouble in the first place. I might attempt to go in tomorrow with the help of a colleague who lives close to me. She doesn't leave until around 10:00 a.m. so I'll call ahead to make sure that the sidewalks are cleared on campus.

On top of this another very close friend is having surgery this week and is facing a life changing illness. And because they are self employed they happen to be without insurance, so who knows how that will affect their future. And in the bigger picture with the loss of the super majority, which I still don't fully understand the significance of, there is a real chance that the health care reform the country is in dire need of is about to be lost once again. It breaks my heart to think about how many people are without insurance and are just one serious illness away from bankruptcy.

So many people who are following their dreams must make the chose to go without insurance because of the extreme costs to get private health insurance in this country. The fact that in order to live life on their terms means giving up the security of health insurance is just wrong. Too many creative people make this difficult choice now because there are so few options. I pray that it won't mean bankruptcy for my friend and that our government can get their act together so that people will have more options in the future.

I made the above treasury using Made by Hand a site I had seen around before but never really explored until today. It allows you to search, make wish lists, and create what they call spotlights like the above, incorporating items from all of the major handmade sites. If you click on the item it will take you directly to the listing for sale.

Inspire Me

Get the flash player here: http://www.adobe.com/flashplayer

‘You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.’

— Jack London

I know that you would think with 4 weeks on the couch that I would have a whole lot of finished knits to show for it. But you would unfortunately be wrong. The first 2 weeks are a blur to me since I was in a lot of pain and taking some serious pain meds that left my brain in a fog. The last two weeks have been pretty unproductive too. I have a small pile of hats that I've made and that is it. Ani was over tonight and looked at the few things at the end of the couch and she said "is that it." I thought you would have filled a room with hats by now.

I made the Flickr widget of my knitted creations at PictoBrowser to help get my creative juices flowing. I have been completely lacking in inspiration. My craft room is a cluttered mess at the moment and I can't really get in there to get to my yarn. When I'm lacking inspiration normally I will go in my room, get out piles of yarn and start playing with different color combinations. I will look through my stitch books until something lights my fire.

I had Mike bring me out some books and some yarn but it just wasn't the same. Tonight Ani went deeper into the yarn stash than Mike chose to venture. She drug a bunch of different things out and helped me to come up with some color combos that peaked my interest. That is what I needed to do a week ago.

I'm not going to beat myself up about not using this time off from work more productively. My body was healing and that was the priority. I wasn't really in a position to make the most of the time and sometimes you can't force it.

I've been thinking a lot about the direction that I want to go with my business in the next year. I just don't know if trying to sell on-line is really worth it to me. It is a lot of work for very little pay off. I'm sure I will have a post soon with my thoughts on this.

Dreaming of Sunnier Days

“I've been absolutely terrified every moment of my life -- and I've never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do.”

Georgia O” Keefe

As I mentioned in my previous post I have found myself randomly obsessed with New Mexico recently. It started like 6 months ago. I honestly can't remember what the spark was but ever since I see hints of it everywhere I look, in books, movies, websites, etc. I have talked Mike into vacationing there in June for a week to 10 days. No, I don't think we will be moving there anytime soon but I told Mike yesterday that I thought we should retire there. He gave me a really strange look like he was wondering what I had been smoking.

This afternoon I was playing travel agent for Tif and Chris and looking for an all inclusive package somewhere sunny for their honeymoon. If you are looking for a similar trip let me recommend the Dominican Republic. There are some amazing deals there right now. I don't know if it's because of the earthquake but the prices were even tempting to me on some of the resorts I was looking at.

But back to New Mexico. I've been trying to get my head around our itinerary. I know that we will be flying into Albuquerque since that is the only major airport but I don't think we'll spend more than a day there. From there we will head to Santa Fe for at least 3 days. There are lots of cultural things to do here and beautiful scenery for golfing/hiking for Mike, as well as Los Alamos which as a physics teacher he is already nerding out about.

From there I am determined to head up to Taos via the high road which supposedly has views out of this world (This is the area that Georgia O'Keeffe made famous). I want to hit as many galleries and studios that I can as this is one of the most artistic communities in the world. I don't think there will be as much for Mike to do here so I probably won't be able to get him to stay more than 2 days. We'll stay at a local B & B here which I always love to do when traveling.

Here is where I get fuzzy in my planning. I want to get the full experience and I don't think the trip would be complete without heading southeast to Roswell and the White Sands. I just don't know how many extra days that would add to the trip. I know that it is going to be a half days drive to get there. I think it would be worth it but I also know that Mike isn't the best traveler and I wonder if we might be better served sticking to the Northern territory and really doing it right.
My family took a trip to the Southwest when I was really young. I think I have a memory of the White Sands but Mom doesn't think so since we were there for less than an hour and I would have just been 3 or 4 years old. I have a feeling associated with it of wonder as I felt the sand in my toes, but it could be a created memory from the pictures I've seen from the trip. I would love to see it again if it is possible. I really think I need some wonder in my life after the year I've had.

Cinderella, Cinderella!

I just watched a really cool documentary on the Doc Channel called The Cinderella's of Santa Fe. I taped it because it was set in New Mexico which I have developed a strange obsession with recently, but that is another post. It turned out to be a great example of indie work all around. It follows a group of women and one token guy who want to live out their creative dreams but have to make ends meet by working other jobs instead. Sound familiar? I thought many of you could probably relate and would like to know that you are not alone.

I loved all of the arty details of the film including the graphics and the music. I would recommend it if you are someone who dreams of being able to live life on your own terms. These ladies may not have all of the answers but it is nice to see the issues explored. Many of them complain about how the arts are so unappreciated in our country. They talk about their counterparts who have the same college degrees as themselves and are supported in their countries by grants and funding to be able to create full time. One of the slides said that the U.S. Armed Forces currently has close to 200 bands and that the funding that goes to support them is twice the annual budget for the National Endowment for the Arts. All I can say to that is WHY?

There was also some interesting discussions of the Jungian archetypes of Cinderella, Evil Stepmother, and the Fairy Godmother, etc. I did not know that the Cinderella story was first seen in a Chinese tale dating back to 860 A.D. and has been seen in many cultures since. I like how they described the Stepmother/Stepsisters as representing all those people/forces keeping us from our dreams. For some of the girls the evil stepmother was actually found inside of themselves, including doubts of their abilities and talent. I think we can all relate to that.

It looks like the Doc Channel owns the rights to the film and it is on their regular rotation of films. The same filmmakers also made American Waitress, New Mexico which I have set to record later in the week. I'm looking forward to watching it too.

Random Thoughts

There is still time to buy your handmade Valentines cards from Hearts for Haiti with all proceeds going to Doctors Without Border's relief efforts in Haiti. Here are a few of my favorites that are for sale in the card section of their site. The top card was donated by jbart.etsy.com. This set of 20 mini cards portray images of original acrylic and digital artwork by Karen Altman. They would be perfect for you older child to pass out to their closest friends and are far superior to the standard fare found at the market. They were donated by twigstudionc.etsy.com.
I have bought Valentines Day gifts for just about everyone that I can think of from the site. I admit it's much harder to find gifts for the guys but I have managed. Since my shop is closed at the moment, I have their Etsy mini on the blog for now.

I have practically been a social butterfly this weekend. Last night I went out to dinner with Mike and his mother which is our traditional Friday night event. It's important to Mike that all three of us are there or it just isn't Friday night. This was the first in almost a month that I've managed to make it out. It was a hassle getting there obviously but it was well worth it. Today we had some company including Ani which lifted my spirits considerably. Tomorrow we have our Rep Theatre tickets for an afternoon showing. I called ahead and had mine changed to handicapped seating. I'm hopeful that it won't be too much trouble to get me there.

This week Ani was talking to me about some little power struggle going on in her classroom between the girls. I replayed it to a very uninterested Mike and then later when we were watching TV I had a revelation and said, "I think the real problem is M. not G." Mike said I think the real problem is that you need to get back to work so that you stop thinking about this elementary school drama.

He really wants me to try to get into work some next week. I just don't think it is worth it to spend an hour getting into the office with the drive and hassle of getting into the building, work for a half day and then turning around and doing it again to get home. Especially since it's really not busy right now. If it was three weeks ago when we were super busy I would make the effort but even my boss told me that it just isn't worth it right now. In 2 weeks I will hopefully be able to put some weight on it. I will still need my walker but it won't be like it is now. I think I will go back part time on days that I can get someone to stop by and help me get to my car the following week. After seeing me hop my way to the car, down the steps, and on the sloped driveway my mother in law has forbidden me from doing it by myself.

The worst pain I'm dealing with right now is actually from the incision on the right side. It's the one that only had 7 staples and 2 screws. The other side had 14 staples and 6 screws but it hasn't caused me much pain since a few days after the surgery. I think the surgeon pinched my skin when putting the staples in on the right side. Mike said they looked bunched up when they were removing them and there was a lot of bleeding. They are covered by some type of bandage so I can't see if there is anything wrong but Mike says I would know it if there was an infection. It burns and is uncomfortable but it is manageable so I'm not going to worry too much about it.

Hope you all are having a good weekend. Thanks for listening to my ramblings.

Wedding Planning From my Couch

My husband has had the same best friend since he was 4 years old. He grew up next door to Chris and Mike and his twin brother treated Chris like he was their triplet. He and Mike roomed together in college and when Chris moved back here 5 years ago they picked up their friendship as if they hadn't been apart for almost a decade, including starting the band Mike had always dreamed of. Chris brought his girlfriend Tif here to live and we have become good friends as well.



When I first met Tif I remember thinking that she was very sweet but that she was going to be too normal for me to get very close to her. My friends have always been a bit on the eccentric side and because of my own quirks it's important to me to know that other people have their own. Well, I totally misread Tif. Yes, she dresses relatively preppy, is very outdoorsy/athletic, and is a successful Professional Organizer (runs Your Life Organized in the St. Louis area.) All of these are about as opposite of me as you can get but underneath Tif has more than enough quirks to make it interesting. She has been a great inspiration to me in a lot of ways.

This summer Chris finally decided it was time to make it legal, after six years together and everyone close to them so sure that they were meant to be married. They are working with a very conservative budget and paying for much of the wedding themselves. They have downsized their expectations while still finding a water location in the area. There is going to be a lakeside wedding outdoors and the reception will be in the same location indoors. The boys will be playing their music at the reception.

I've been helping as much as I can from the couch since Tif is in the middle of her biggest season of the year at work and she has been struggling to get the planning started. I've enjoyed looking up photographers and narrowing the choices, looking at bridal shops and figuring out what other vendors we need to be booking. Her Mom is an artist and does booth designs so she will be in charge of the decorations but I'm hoping to help get the beach theme in place. Here is the website which she whipped up one afternoon for the wedding.

At the top of the page is the mood board I did for the wedding on Dessy Design a Wedding Styleboard Tool coordinated with the new Pantone Wedding system. I discovered the tool from Thyme2dream's blog. She is currently giving a $20 gift certificate to her Artfire shop to anyone who makes a mood board that uses one of her pieces. I found the hair comb which goes perfectly with Tif's theme and would look lovely in her long dark hair on the big day. As long as she likes it I plan on using the gift certificate to get it for her.

The dress if one that we found online that she really likes from David's Bridal. I found the picture of the cake which I think is so fun. She wants cupcakes which this has along with a small cake in the middle. The seashell decorations are the perfect beachy touch.

It has been really good for me to have something productive to work on during my sick leave. It looks like I'm going to have another week to be a horizontal wedding planner. The surgeon removed my staples on Monday and said things appeared to be healing properly. But they did not recommend that I go back to work next week. They want me to keep it elevated for another week to avoid swelling which could seriously slow down the healing process. I am going to play it by ear as we go forward.

Peace Paige

So the physical pain is mostly over from the fracture. I still have some discomfort if I move it the wrong way but I'm pretty much off all of the pain meds now. Now comes the part of my recovery which may be even more difficult for me I'm afraid. I have to keep myself from going into a major Depression from the boredom and inconvenience. I am highly susceptible to a depression this time of year even under normal conditions. The holidays are over and my craft show season is done so there is always a big letdown in January/February. Once Spring comes around I will get a pick up from the weather change and more light during the daytime.

With this situation taking me completely out of my routine for weeks of time if not months there is a big potential for a mental downturn. The only thing that I have going for me is the fact that I and my family are all on high alert for it. It is usually when I'm not expecting it and have my guard down that the worst depressions sneak up on me. In this case I'm watching for the signs and trying to stay positive as much as possible.

Mike and I both are great creatures of habit. This is one characteristic that most bonds us together. We hate change and we have our routines that we live by that helps keep us sane and balanced. The broken ankle has destroyed the routines completely. I have been sleeping on the couch every night since the fall. It is easier for me to get to the bathroom and I can slide on and off my rolling chair to get where I need to go in the house. Mike has been wanting me to use the walker more because it will help me get back more of my normal life. I got myself into bed yesterday which was a major accomplishment. I actually got emotional from the normalcy of laying in my own bed. The smells and the feeling of laying there was so sweet. It really is the little things that you miss when you can't get to them.

One of the ladies from the office came by on Friday to bring some cards and gifts and it was so nice to sit and gossip with her about the office for a few minutes. After I had told her all my stories about the fall/surgery she said, "I'm sure you don't want to hear what we talked about at the staff meeting this morning." I was like "no, please tell me." It was nice to be thinking about something from my normal life and not about my problems for a change.

I go in to see the surgeon tomorrow afternoon. He will remove the stitches and put on whatever permanent cast I will need. I'm hoping for an air cast since those can be removed and cleaned. I'm hoping that I will feel more confident and secure once I have a solid cast on my whole foot. I'd like to be able to go out to eat this week and we are going to figure out a way to get me back to work. I'm going to take this week off as there is nothing to rush back to right now. The semester started last week so the busy time is over. I need to work on getting myself out of the house, down the stairs, and into my car by myself. If this isn't going to be possible than I need to get my schedule worked out so that I can get rides from other people in the office from my area.

I have terrible balance and with the extra weight I'm carrying right now there is no way I will be able to use crutches to maneuver the steps. We rented a walker which I need to practice with and we also have the wheelchair that I can use once I get to the office. It is going to be difficult however you look at it. I really hope that my ankle is healing well and that I will be able to put weight on it in 3 or 4 weeks like he originally said would be possible if the surgery went well.

The pictures at the top are from a barn on the farm. My mom originally spray painted "congrats Angie, Sr. 89" on the barn when she graduated High School. She put "peace Paige, Sr. 91" when I graduated since I was such a flower child at the time, imagine that. There are pictures and dates for each of my other siblings as well. They are fading fast so I took a picture of them a few months ago when I was home.